Here is a link to play the computer game Pac-Man Computer Game

Pac-Man Computer Game is about eating everything over and over again. This isn’t really a popular subject for a computer game these days because eating is seen as the leading cause of fatness and of other diseases by association. Doctors agree that there are diseases that are linked from both food and fatness. Pac-Man has all of these diseases. In fact, the word “Pac” probably comes from an ancient word that means “yourdiseasesasapiechart.blogspot”. This is illustrated below:

The word “Man” is the word man, of which Pac-Man isn’t.

Pac-Man lives inside a ghost maze full of food. The ghosts want to kill Pac-Man but ghosts do not eat food. It is hard to know where the conflict lies, which is the mystery that keeps players coming back for more Pac-Man. Here are a few of the speculative reasons about why the ghosts might kill Pac-Man:

1 – The ghosts do not like the repetitive sound that Pac-Man makes

2 – Pac-Man has an awful personality

3 – Pac-Man emits a smell that is offensive to ghosts

4 – The touching and killing of Pac-Man is totally by accident

5 – Pac-Man Pac-Man

I suspect that all of this is massive nonsense anyway because Pac-Man is already dead and we are all in hell. We are in one of the courts of the chinese hell called Diyu. Diyu is an underground maze with many courts of torture. Pac-Man’s hell is chased by ghosts and eating food hell.

Pac-Man is born in hell and gets chased to death or eats to death and then he is reborn in hell. The length of punishment depends on how naughty Pac-Man was. Pac-Man was at least 255 naughty. On the 256th the Pac-Man Computer Game is broken, which is sad for Pac-Man because he doesn’t get reincarnated on earth but at least if you’re really good at Pac-Man Computer Game you get to stop sometime and go to bed.

The existence of a couple of things in Pac-Man’s court are interesting and I will speculate on those:

1 – The fruit

The fruit is ironic because hell has to be ironic. Pac-Man doesn’t like fruit. The little dots look super bland and so Pac-Man yearns for taste and so he goes for taste and then he’s like aaah it’s fruit no way. Pac-Man is allergic to fruit. It makes him want to puke up but he has to eat it because it tastes and then he has to go to the hospital but he can’t because he’s in hell.

2 – The big dots

Big dots let Pac-Man eat the ghosts in an ironic reversal of roles. This is because Pac-Man hell is also ghost hell. The ghosts were probably something like conjoined quadruplets and so they all did the same thing and so they get the same hell and it is a complementary hell to Pac-Man’s. I guess the ghosts are not conjoined in hell so they can fit through the little corridors. Pac-Man can eat them sometimes because the ghosts also need to die in hell, it’s not really a thing for Pac-Man. It’s just being economical with space. Hell is not infinite. Ironically, if the ghosts were to be worse at killing Pac-Man and let him kill them more often then they would be sooner reincarnated out of hell but they don’t know that.

3 – Pac-Man is yellow

Not really a big deal but I suppose Pac-Man is jaundiced from ruining his liver due to food. I expect it effects his performance.

Now I will talk more about the design and funtional elements of the game.

Design

Pac-Man Computer Game has eight colours (not including black and white because it is not known if these are colours) which are yellow, red, orange, pink, blue, different blue, purple and green. So that’s every colour. It is impossible for any other computer game to be more colourful and so from purely a design perspective that makes this computer game one of the best computer games. Asteroids has zero colours because black and white are unconfirmed as colours. Pac-Man is better than Asteroids or even Missile Command.

Pac-Man Computer Game has a looking straight down but also from the side perspective. This is very modern. Bomberman is similar and you might think of Bomberman but that is just from one angle looking down diagonally at the bombermen. Bomberman is junk. Pac-Man looks from two angles.

Function

In the game you need to press four buttons and these are flightless arrow north, flightless arrow south, flightless arrow east and flightless arrow west. They do more than make Pac-Man move to the north, south, east and west because remember that whilst he is moving through one dimension he is also moving through another (or is he?!). For example, if Pac-Man was travelling from east to west and I was to action the north flightless arrow, Pac-Man, at the next available opportunity, would alter his course to comply and would suddenly be travelling both to the north and vertically upwards. This would be shocking enough by itself but then think back to the moment a short time ago when he was travelling from east to west, for then he was also travelling from left to right. Left to right and east to west are in fact along the same plane and are so effectively the same. This means that Pac-Man can either travel through one or two dimensions as and when he pleases. There is no other thing that eats that can do the same.

To Conclude

Here are my conclusion topics:

1 – Narrative

The story is in the “downbeat supernatural” genre that is very popular these days in literature and movie pictures and also computer games. It is a very modern story.

2 – Playability

It just keeps going until it’s broken!

3 – Design

Every single colour is used in the game.

4 – Functionality

Very modern and also scientific like quantum mechanics (but you don’t have to know anything about quantum mechanics to play the game but you might learn something about them! /it?

That is the end of the first computer game review. I don’t know if I’ll do another.

Pups!

merry chirstmas!

bit small there

Instead I’m going to put a few of the same pages together that I’ve drawn a bunch of times and they should speak for themselves.

One thing of note is that as the style develops and the pages get steadily better, the pages that are already done get steadily worse.

This begs the question of whether this will ever end. I hope we will reach an acceptable plateau soon.

^This page featured in an earlier blog post, probably from over a year ago and is now classified as “SUBSTANDARD for all of the reasons”

The content contained above in one page has now been embiggened to four pages of higher quality work. You’ll notice the change in style as well as quality, preferring the thicker lines and bolder contrast of the comic book medium over the thinner lines and less contrast of whatever I was producing before:

However I am also expecting these to progress into becoming substandard within an alarmingly short space of time. This is a modestly depressing thought but also a slightly exciting one but mostly not really much of a thought at all at the moment because I have other things to think about. Like redoing all of my earlier pages. For example:

The way I want the world in the story presented has been changing gradually and is now at a satisfying point so I’ll try to keep it here. At first I was favouring showing as little as possible but that was “PROBLEMATIC to future developments” and lacking the depth and conviction required to ensure belief in the place as being a place. Also there needed to be “BETTER CLOUDS” as I like drawing clouds and I was conning myself out of drawing satisfying clouds.

That was all a lot wordier than I wanted it to be and goes against one of my introductory statements:

“Instead I’m going to put a few of the same pages together that I’ve drawn a bunch of times and they should speak for themselves.”

and probably makes me sound presumptuous and narcissistic. It’s really hard to come across as a likable person in a blog post. It’s a good job you’re an idiot.

Finally I became tired of him getting away with doing whatever he wants all the time in a drawer and not working because he’s useless at his job and he doesn’t even care. I decided the only way to deal with people like that is to burn them in a fire.

I did bring this up with him a minute or so before I was going to burn him in a fire and he didn’t seem too surprised, I guess it happens to them all eventually, and so without any further ado, I burnt him in a fire. I only regret not doing it sooner.

I documented it because he deserved it:

Here he is saying “thank you for doing this, I appreciate it really. It’s just nice to be out of the drawer where I could do what I wanted. And it’s nice to see you, of course.”

Here he says “so goodbye then I guess. um…oh it’s quite warm isn’t it, this fire? you know I never thought it would be quite this warm but now that I’m so close to this fire here I can feel how warm it is and I can appreciate how much warmer it’s likely to get when I’m inside. That’s funny isn’t it? ha ha.”

“hmm?” I say.

Here he says “lordy, I am extremely flammable. That’s good though I suppose, to get all this over quickly. I’m sure that’s why you…um, ugh, it’s really very hot.”

I say “ooh”

Here he says “uck…ak, gah. oh. blimey. You know, you don’t realise how much you like your hands and feet until they’ve been melted by a fire. hey, ha, I’m like that man from that film Volcano aren’t I? Ha ha. He melts too doesn’t he, and he has a family and stuff. Doesn’t he? And he was saving those people too. Wasn’t he. Hey?”

“okay”

“You know, this is real…ugh..pfff…uh,nice isn’t it. Just two guys hanging out together, having a…real good time beside or inside an incredibly hot fire. Gosh, oh gosh, it’s a shame we won’t be able to do this much longer. I suppose great times can only last…uh, so… do you think you could jus…hu? no? okay that’s fine I’m sure.

“no”

“i love you…(?)”

Norovirus Nachos are an extremely effective weight loss solution. Do not let your doctor convince you otherwise

Dawson!